Alan is a volunteer for Sands United FC Larne. This Volunteers' Week he shares more about why he became involved with Sands United and why he’s so proud to be part of a football community that helps with people’s healing.  

“My partner and I had a miscarriage in the 90s. There wasn’t a lot of support back then especially for men and it was a hard time. It was when I was scrolling through Facebook that I first found Sands. It was a charity that spoke to me given my own loss and I felt as a football coach with 30 years’ experience of coaching and managing teams, that I could use my skills to give a hand to Sands United.  

I’m really pleased that my skills make a difference to other bereaved parents and families.  

"Joining a football team like Sands United Larne FC is taking an action when you’re going through a tough time. Dads, uncles, grandads and others close to a family can all find baby loss hard and are all welcome.  

“When people join our team there’s an automatic understanding and they’re welcomed in and supported by others who have been through tough times too.

“Volunteering means being able to tune into when someone needs to talk and when they just want to get involved in the football. Sometimes a few words with someone over a cup of tea and a biscuit can make all the difference. I always try to be approachable and open so that players can come to me for a chat when they’re ready or when they need to. I also always try to look forward for opportunities and matches with other teams and organisations too, to see what we can do next.  

Playing football with Sands is part of people’s healing.

“And being part of Sands United Larne FC is more than football training; it’s a community and I’m really proud that I’m part of that.  

If anyone is thinking about joining a Sands United team, you’ll always be more than welcome.

“Our teams aren’t about who has the best football ability, they’re about playing in memory of your baby and pulling a jersey on in their memory. Anniversaries of loss are important and playing in a Sands United team is a way of taking action to remember and it helps.  

“Even if you don’t or can’t play football, there are plenty of other ways to get involved as part of our community. Partners and wives do so much for our team as well and some people help with social media or photographs. There’s a job for everyone!  

People shouldn’t have to go through pregnancy or baby loss alone and I’d hate to think that they were.

“There wasn’t enough support when I needed it, but I think times are changing and we’re talking about baby loss more. Talking and the work Sands do is needed.”

Find out more about our Sands United teams and how they support bereaved men, and their families, in communities across the UK.