Please be aware Frankie has chosen to share pictures of her daughters Arabella and Isabel with her story and also shares a video where she is holding baby Arabella as she speaks about her fundraising for Sands.
Where do we start! It’s fair to say that we were regulars at the recurrent miscarriage clinic.
November 2022 was probably one of the worst months of my life. From the minute you test positive on a pregnancy test you go through such a mixed bag of emotions.
We had four losses in total. Four positive pregnancy tests! A whirlwind of emotions.
The worst one I had was November 2022, the others were all quite early from six to 12 weeks.
A standout moment for us which sticks with me is at a private scan the lady saying there’s no heartbeat after bleeding. I knew something wasn’t right, so I had booked a private scan that morning.
I couldn’t get through to anyone on the phone at triage, which is meant to be a constant open line, at the hospital but the next thing I remember is a midwife on the phone, who finally picked up in the afternoon, preparing me that a loss was going to happen over the next couple of hours. At the NHS hospital that same day they couldn’t give me a scan and I was told to head home.
Little did I know those next hours were going to be the worst of our life. Such a painful experience both mentally and physically. My partner Ben was a constant rock through it all and was present through everything. He must have seen so much but he was there for me. He had to call 111 because the clots I had were constant and could fill a cup of coffee every five minutes. I had to go back to hospital and be kept in overnight.
After everything happened and I was discharged from hospital the following day I was requested to have another scan. My heart was sinking as I waited with other pregnant mums in the waiting room with my husband. This is something that needs to change and I feel should never have happened. Hospitals need to separate those waiting rooms somehow.
We were basically waiting to be told what we already knew but they had to do a final check to make sure everything had passed. During this examination there was a doctor who had a new starter that day. It was his first week and she asked if he could do the internal exam for training purposes. I felt inclined to let him, but I was still bleeding heavily. I wish I had said no as that wasn’t the right time to show someone new learning a new skill - it was my entire life shattered. Ben told me I was so brave.
When we were discharged, I had no help. Nothing just my close family and friends, Ben and my work.
The reason I’m pushing so hard for Sands, the stillbirth and neonatal death charity is because they are pushing so hard for us! They see us, they want to be present and are all about the aftercare after this type of horror happens. We didn’t know about Sands at the time of our losses as we weren’t advised or given any aftercare, but Sands are trying to be present for all losses and to ensure everyone is checked in with during and after a loss.
If loss is happening to you and you have no help or you’re being told nothing can be done by the GP, please push for help. Eventually I got a doctor who listened to me. Even though in the end we conceived our daughter Arabella naturally, unfortunately, you have to have had three or more recurrent losses until you’re heard which again is shocking.
I felt anger for a long time after my losses but I can’t be angry at life or the hospital because the staff did everything they could for us.
And I now have the most beautiful gift which is Arabella. She’s everything and more and I like to think she was a reason for what happened to us. Bella needed me and I needed her and it was all about timing.
My midwife was a constant support during my pregnancy with Arabella. I had a lot of nerves during the pregnancy, but she was outstanding.
During Bella’s birth, the team were absolutely phenomenal too. I birthed Bella naturally in the birth centre which is a separate department from where I experienced my losses which was amazing.
Since I first submitted my story, we’ve added little Isabel to our family too on 16th December 2025. We’re doing really well and our family is now complete. After all those years of lows, we finally made it. I want others to know there is always hope.
Frankie also wanted to share the below video of herself and baby Arabella alongside her story talking about why she chose to support our Run 50K challenge in April 2025:
