This Sands Awareness Week we’re celebrating our Sands community. And inviting more people to join us. So we can support anyone touched by pregnancy loss or baby loss. Always.
We asked some of the existing members of our community what Sands means to them.
Laura and TJ's connection to Sands.
"After five years together, we were excited to grow our family and make Primrose the best big sister. Since Laura had carried Primrose, TJ wanted to experience pregnancy this time. We felt incredibly fortunate that our IVF journey was successful on the first attempt. When we found out we were adding another girl to our girl gang, it all began to feel very real—and incredibly exciting. We had already chosen her name, Amelie, and her nursery was ready. Despite a challenging pregnancy marked by sickness, we were low-risk and everything seemed to be progressing well. Amelie was growing perfectly, with no concerns.
"Sadly, 3 days before our due date, we experienced reduced movements. We immediately attended the hospital, and our worse fears were confirmed. There was no heartbeat. Amelie arrived via elective caesarean and was perfect. A healthy 7lb 30z. Later, we learned through testing that there had been an issue with the placenta known as Delayed Villous Maturation (DVM). Sadly, there are no symptoms or standard tests for DVM; typically identified through growth scans, which we had no indication to undergo. We know that more research is needed into DVM and charities are working to research this area.
"Our incredible bereavement midwife introduced us to a range of support resources, including Sands. We’ve found great comfort in their work—whether through something as simple as TV trigger warnings or reading the stories of other families. We've also come to understand that many stillbirths are preventable, and the research and advocacy that Sands supports is vital. Fundraising and taking on new challenges for Sands has given us purpose and focus during this incredibly difficult time. One such challenge was the Snowdon Midnight Hike, which was both emotional and deeply fulfilling. It gave us a space to connect with others, share our story, and speak Amelie’s name.
"We'd sum up what Sands means to us as comfort, support, and awareness."
- Laura and TJ, Amelie’s mums and Sands supporters.
Rob McDonald's connection to Sands
"In April 2023 we lost our little boy Ollie at 17 weeks old. I was in hospital, extremely ill and close to dying from sepsis and my partner had a routine midwife scan and was told it was normal but they couldn't find a heartbeat on the Doppler. So they arranged a scan at the hospital I was in.
"The nurse said the words that will haunt me forever. "Im sorry I cant find a heartbeat." I was broken physically and mentally and didn't have any energy to be able to grieve properly due to being so ill. I had to be strong as I could for my partner Jo while being a man and showing no weakness. It broke me. I was feeling along, lost, dead inside and was angry, confused and very upset.
"This is when I found Sands United. The group I joined in Dudley helped me to grieve, supported me and made me feel I could talk about how I felt and got me through my anger I was feeling. We then moved back to the south west of England. I felt I needed to help other men in Somerset so I set up my own Sands United team in Taunton so they could get the same support. This has helped me moving forwards as well seeing more bereaved men get the help that they need.
"This connection to Sands has got me through the worst period in my life. Sands makes me proud that I can honour Ollie in the way that he should be and I will never forget him.
"The three words that sum up Sands for me are support, pride and acceptance."
- Rob McDonald, Ollie's dad and Sands United FC Taunton manager.
Asiya Dawood's connection to Sands.
"I started volunteering with Sands just over three years ago. I was approached by Madhuri Bedi, Sands' Outreach Coordinator for South Asian Communities, after she saw my work on social media in regards to baby loss in the South Asian community.
"Volunteering with Sands has helped to normalise the talk around baby loss in our community. I stayed off by sharing my story during Ramadan and Eid, and how baby loss can affect us during these important celebratory times.
"I became a member of the South Asian round table and joined Madhuri in various research to provide information on why baby loss is higher in the black and brown community. Volunteering for Sands has helped in ways which I never thought were possible. It has given me the chance to heal over the losses of my four babies and has given me the opportunity to use my voice to help many in our community. I hope to do more in the future with sands and be able to provide the safe space required so desperately in our community.
"I'd sum up Sands as community, togetherness, and supportive."
- Asiya Dawood, Founder of Asian Miscarriage Hub.
Jo Mason's connection to Sands
"Sands first became a part of my life in 2023 whilst I was undergoing trauma-focused CBT therapy for postnatal anxiety and post-traumatic stress disorder. This had developed following the loss of our baby in 2022. After seeing all of the fantastic work that Sands does, I realised that there was a support network out there and a community of other bereaved parents who had all experienced the heartbreak of pregnancy and baby loss.
"After reaching out to Sands for support, I took on the role of parent speaker. This involves sharing my story with healthcare professionals and therapists during their training sessions run by Sands. This is important to me because it helps to improve the care and support that other bereaved parents will receive in the future. It also allows me to feel as though I am turning my experience into something positive, in memory of our baby.
"I am currently a member of the Sands Insights Network and the Sands committee for Swindon. I am looking forward to assisting with new projects that can help to shape the future care and support available after pregnancy and baby loss. In September, I will be running the Swindon half marathon to give something back to a fantastic charity who have helped me so much.
"Three words that sum up what Sands means to me are hope, community, and remembrance."
- Jo Mason, bereaved mum and Parent Speaker.
Saz Vora's connection to Sands
"In my late fifties, during a particularly difficult time marked by both physical and mental health struggles, I found myself on a wellbeing programme to help manage depression, anxiety and panic attacks. It was during this period of deep reflection and healing that I returned to a manuscript I had written over a decade earlier. Encouraged by my therapist, I finally found the courage to publish it.
"The book tells the story of an East African Gujarati couple in the 1990s whose firstborn suffers a brain haemorrhage at birth. I had set the story in the past, believing that my community had progressed, that times had changed. But the response I received after publication told a different story, one that revealed just how much remained the same. Silence, shame, and a lack of space to grieve openly still lingered within the South Asian community.
"It was through this shared silence that I met Madhuri Bedi, Sands' Outreach Coordinator for South Asian Communities. Both of us had experienced the devastating loss of a baby, and when she suggested forming a group where we could speak openly about our experiences, I jumped at the chance.
"That group became the South Asian Round Table, a safe space where I could finally talk about my own story. I had honestly believed that no one would be interested in hearing it. After all, I’m a woman in my sixties, still grieving for a child who was only with me for the briefest of moments. But I quickly realised I was not alone. Our stories matter. They deserve to be heard, however long ago the loss may have occurred.
"Perhaps one day, I’ll write that story too. For now, I write women’s fiction, always with love at its heart. My stories aim to shine a light on stigma and taboo, especially those that persist in South Asian communities. Through fiction, I hope to give voice to what is so often left unsaid.
"Grief doesn’t have an expiry date. And healing often begins when we allow ourselves, and each other, to speak the unspoken.
"To sum up what Sands means to me: recovery, healing, and connection."
- Saz Vora, Chetan's mum.
Raj Chagger's connection to Sands
"Sands has become a very important part of my life; the work I do with the charity makes me feel closer to my baby boy, Riaan, who passed away aged 7 months old. It’s hard to explain but when I do anything for Sands, I feel like I am doing it on Riaan’s behalf, like I am giving back for him and in his name. It’s like it’s my way of still being able to parent him, and that’s important to me.
"The work that Sands does is incredible, and I feel genuinely honoured that bereaved parents trust me to share with me (through working with Sands), not only the most traumatic experiences of their lives, but also the beauty of their babies. To help parents remember and honour their babies is a privilege.
"Managing the Sands United FC Nottingham team has not only put me in a position whereby I can support bereaved dads, but also given me a community where I can be supported too. Sands has given me a purpose, an opportunity to use my own experiences of loss and other life experiences to help shape bereavement support.
"What Sands means to me in three words: hope, light and community."
- Raj Chagger, Riaan's dad and Sands United FC Nottingham founder.
Tara Alexis' connection to Sands
"Early Summer in 2021 I reached out to Sands with an idea around supporting women (particularly those from Black and brown communities) who had experienced pregnancy and baby loss. Sands were very positive about my idea and their support over the years has been invaluable.
"My idea grew and I have since gone on to host many events through my organisation, Mothers of Angels and also register as a Community Interest Company (CIC). These events include our annual Mothers Day Sunday Tea and an event during Baby Loss Awareness Week offering emotional support, honest and heartfelt conversations and sharing the work of Sands.
"Helping women form positive connections with other women at such a difficult time has been incredibly rewarding. I've met the most amazing Sands ambassadors, Befrienders, volunteers and staff all working together for a shared cause. I’m very grateful to Sands and look forward to seeing what the future holds for the charity.
"To me Sands is community, they are caring, and resourceful."
- Tara Alexis, Founder of Mothers of Angels.
Everyone is welcome at Sands.
If you’re new to Sands, welcome, and if you already know Sands, thank you for your support.
This Sands Awareness Week we’re also sharing some changes we’ve made to help us reach more people than ever before.
Find out more about how our strengthened brand was created with the Sands community, so together we can reach even more people.