The families behind The Enduring Light diyas
At Sands, we are committed to ensuring that the voices, experiences and views of bereaved parents help shape the support, services and remembrance opportunities we provide.
We know that every family's experience of grief is different, and that there is no single way to seek support following the death of a baby. Whilst some parents find comfort in support groups, befriending services or counselling, others wish to become involved in different ways, helping to shape resources, remembrance activities and projects that may support other families in the future.
Our support group were involved in providing feedback on both the traditional and heart-shaped diyas. Through generously sharing their stories, quotes, images and valuable time, their contributions influenced discussions around the design, purpose and practical use of the diyas, helping to ensure it reflected the needs and experiences of bereaved families whilst remaining meaningful, inclusive and accessible to people from all backgrounds.
We are proud to introduce some of the parents who were part of our co-creation group to share why being involved in the project was meaningful to them.
Meet Ayesha
Every time a diya is lit or seen, I hope bereaved families are reminded of the love and warmth there is for them. Being a part of this co-creation team has reminded me that although we’re all learning how to navigate this heartbreak, which in many moments can feel crushing, we have a light that reminds us of love.
Ayesha, bereaved mum
Meet Vaishali
Diwali is a special time of year for my family as we scattered our daughter, Jaya’s, ashes on Diwali the year she was born. We always light candles for our star babies at special times of the year but also whenever we feel like it. The light of the flame reminds me that their love for us and our love for them will always shine brighter than the darkness that grief can sometimes bring. I hope these diyas will serve as a reminder to others that even in the darkness of grief our babies will always shine their light down on us.
Vaishali, bereaved mum
Meet Selina
I wanted to be part of this diya co-creation group with Sands because it beautifully combined the tradition of lighting a diya with remembering our babies. Being part of this group gave me a way of being part of something which will unite us as we all light our diyas together, whilst offering comfort, love and creating a safe space for remembrance. Contributing to this group helped me find meaning within my own grief for Aveer, and allowed me to input on something that will be lit in homes, carrying light, love and remembrance further than my own.
Selina, bereaved mum
Meet Dimple
Being part of the Sands diya co-creation group means a great deal to me because light has always been an important part of how we remember our daughter, Mannat who was stillborn in 2023. As a family, we regularly light candles and diyas during Diwali, birthdays, New Year, and other special occasions, and every Diwali we leave a diya at her grave. There is something incredibly comforting and meaningful about the warmth of a flame – it helps us feel connected to her and keeps her memory present in our everyday lives.
The diya is especially important because it reflects both our culture and our experience of loss. To me and my husband, its light represents love, remembrance and the enduring bond we have with our daughter. Knowing that other bereaved families may light this diya in memory of their babies feels very special, creating a sense of connection and shared remembrance across all.
Dimple, bereaved mum
Meet Bindhu
I wanted to be involved in Sands' The Enduring Light campaign because I know first-hand the pain of losing a child, having experienced the loss of four babies myself. Creating these diyas is a deeply personal way to honour their memory, raise awareness, and offer comfort and hope to other families who are navigating the heartbreak of baby loss, reminding them that they are not alone.
Bindhu, bereaved mum
Meet Bina
Being part of the Sands diya co-creation group has been deeply meaningful. What began as a symbol of celebration and light has taken on an even deeper meaning for me, representing love, remembrance and the enduring connection we have with our babies. There is something incredibly powerful about knowing that families from different communities, cultures and faiths will be lighting these diyas, united by love and remembrance.
I hope that when bereaved parents and families light their diya, they feel seen, comforted and less alone. For me, being part of this project has given me a beautiful and tangible way to honour and remember Krishan. I often describe him as my 'Love and Light', and that is exactly what this diya represents to me - a love that never fades and a light that continues to shine.
Bina, bereaved mum
Meet Naveen
My involvement in The Enduring Light diya campaign began when Madhuri shared Shaheda's story and her desire to weave her baby's memory into something beautiful. The idea of holding a piece of light, cupped in the hands like a quiet prayer, struck a deep chord with me. I am profoundly moved and honoured to stand in the company of the remarkable women who give this campaign its heart.
Naveen, bereaved mum
Meet Sita
For me, a diya represents love that continues to shine even after loss. Lighting a diya in Arjuns name has always felt comforting for me. It is a way of saying that he is still remembered, still loved, and still part of our family. I hope this campaign helps other bereaved parents feel less alone and reminds them that our babies' lights continue to glow through us.
Sita, bereaved mum
Meet Sharan
It has been a great privilege to be involved in this project and is very close to my heart. I had been preparing for Riaan's first Diwali when he suddenly passed away five days before we got to celebrate it. I have very fond memories of Diwali as a child and I was so excited to build memories with Riaan. To me a diya is such a significant symbol of Diwali and therefore being part of this project has been truly special. Seeing Shaheda put so much love and energy into creating the perfect diya has been an honour. She has handmade each diya and I know how much love has gone into these. She first-hand understands the heartbreak of losing a baby and that grief has been channelled into creating something so beautiful that will shine light of hope and peace for others.
Sharan, bereaved mum
Meet Poonam
When my husband, Subz, and I lost our baby boy, Anand, our world changed forever. One moment we were filled with joy and anticipation, and the next we were faced with a loss that no parent is ever prepared for. Although 15 years have passed, the love we have for Anand and the grief of not having him with us still sit with us every day. There are moments that remain especially difficult — Mother’s Day, Father’s Day, Christmas, Diwali, and the anniversary of his passing — when the absence feels even more profound, and we find ourselves wondering who he would have become and what life would have looked like with him in it.
In the midst of that grief, Sands gave us something incredibly precious: understanding, comfort, and a space where we were never judged. They acknowledged our Anand, and they supported both of us as parents navigating an unimaginable loss. That compassion stayed with us. It is why being involved in The Enduring Light campaign has meant so much. It has given us a way to honour Anand’s memory, to hold space for all angel babies, and to give something back to the charity that stood beside us when we needed it most.
Poonam, bereaved mum
A reflection from Madhuri, Sands' Outreach Coordinator for South Asian communities
When I first began thinking about this project, I knew how meaningful the symbolism of the diya could be for bereaved families.
Having grown up with diyas, I have always appreciated their deep cultural and spiritual significance. Throughout my life, they have marked moments of celebration, prayer and reflection. Now, I also light diyas in memory of my babies, Vishaal and Rehna, creating quiet moments to remember them and keep them close.
It was this personal connection, together with my own experience of baby loss, that inspired the vision for The Enduring Light.
It has been a privilege to work alongside Shaheda to turn that vision into The Enduring Light, with the care, support and collaboration of colleagues across Sands and the feedback received from the support group.
Our hope is that whatever your culture, faith or background, The Enduring Light diyas offer you a meaningful way to honour your baby and create your own moments of remembrance.