What is Shradh?
Shradh is a Hindu observance in which families honour loved ones who have died. Through prayers, they seek peace for departed souls, ask for blessings from elders who have passed away and give thanks for the place their loved ones held in their lives.
The annual Shradh period, also known as Pitru Paksha, lasts for around a fortnight in September or October. The annual dates are determined by the Hindu lunar calendar. This year, 2026, the observances run from 26 September to 10 October. This period does not replace a loved one’s death anniversary. It offers an additional time each year for remembrance.
Certain days within Shradh have particular significance for remembering different family relationships, such as a day for a mother, father or grandparent. For those who follow these traditions, there can be comfort in knowing that other families are honouring the same relationships on the same day.
Acknowledging pregnancy and baby loss during Shradh
Within this period, there is also a particular day associated with remembering children who have died. This day is called Teras Shradh and, this year, it falls on Thursday 8 October, the day before Baby Loss Awareness Week begins.
Despite this, babies lost during pregnancy or after birth are not always acknowledged during Shradh. In some Hindu traditions, their souls are regarded as pure and innocent, untouched by worldly attachments. The formal rites performed for adults are therefore considered unnecessary for them. When families follow this practice, their baby may also be left out of remembrance, leaving parents feeling that their loss and grief have not been acknowledged.
When formal rites are not observed, families may also be unsure whether or how to include their baby in Shradh. Alongside the stigma and taboo surrounding pregnancy and baby loss, this can leave a baby unspoken about and parents alone with their grief. Seeing other loved ones remembered while their baby is not acknowledged can be particularly painful.
At Sands, we want to help break that silence. We acknowledge these babies and the love and grief their families carry. For families observing Shradh, this can be an opportunity to speak about their baby, remember them openly and have their loss recognised within their family and community.
Remembering Jaya during Shradh
Bereaved mum Vaishali feels that it is important that she continues to talk about her daughter Jaya, and speak up about pregnancy and baby loss to help break the silence and tackle the stigmas that can be part of it. By sharing Jaya’s story, she hopes to help other families to feel seen and heard and know that they don’t have to face baby loss alone.
Vaishali said, “I’ve known about Shradh since I was a little girl as we gathered as an extended family during certain days to honour and remember my paternal grandparents.”
When Jaya died we asked about performing Shradh rituals for her but were told that we do not do this for babies and in our grief, we never questioned it, even though deep down it didn’t sit right with me.
Last year, to find out more about why remembering babies was not something that is widely done during Shradh, Vaishali spoke to a priest she knows well. He said “We perform Shradh rituals for all. It’s just that the smaller ones lost are perhaps not mentioned because the mind doesn’t want to believe the loss. The stigma.”
What he said really struck a chord with Vaishali. She said, “Here was a priest, someone with all this knowledge about our religious rituals saying the opposite of what I had been told. As often experienced in my community, it highlighted the stigma around baby loss. If we don’t think about it or acknowledge it, we can pretend it doesn’t happen.”
The problem is that baby loss does happen, and it’s more common than most people think. Unfortunately, the ‘out of sight, out of mind’ thought process is probably a mindset that has been passed down for generations because pregnancy and baby loss is so taboo in my community.
Vaishali said for the first time last year, her and her husband Rahul, did perform a ritual for Jaya and they donated some chocolates to the local temple to be distributed to the children who attend their school. Vaishali said, “I made some rice balls using cooked rice, milk, honey and sesame seeds and put them outside for the birds to eat. Rahul also gave an offering of water in the garden by pouring water, facing south from a copper vessel. It made us feel closer to Jaya in a way and gave me a sense of peace.
“We were finally able to do something that is part of our culture for our daughter. It also gave us something to laugh about as all day I kept watching to see if there were any birds who were eating my offering of the rice balls. Unfortunately, they were not very popular with the birds, and I will have to reconsider what I offer this year.”
Even though I don’t know many people who perform Shradh rituals for their babies who have died, I don’t think it should be something we should shy away from or just accept either. Jaya is just as deserving to be remembered and honoured in the same way we do for all our relatives who have died and if we are fortunate to have children in the future, we would like them to take part in this ritual for their big sister.
Vaishali added, “It’s important to continue to highlight to people in the community that we should feel comfortable to perform these rituals for our babies and that it doesn’t have to be something that is too sad or uncomfortable. We can use this day to signify a celebration of their short life and the positive impact they have had on us.
It can be really hard to take that step forward and do things differently, but I’ve found that being open and vocal about wanting Jaya to be celebrated and remembered has made a big difference. Even though we perform the ritual alone in our household, we are open about the other things we do for Jaya throughout the year, and people have been really accepting and even join in with other special days we mark for her throughout the year.
Baby Loss Awareness Week (BLAW) starts tomorrow, 9 October, the day after Teras Shradh. Vaishali said, “It feels even more significant to continue to perform the ritual again. I don’t know how I will feel doing it this year though. It might feel peaceful. It might feel difficult. I might not want to offer anything at all. Every year is different generally when it comes to baby loss and I can never truly gauge how I might feel. I hope that the peace I experienced last year will make BLAW easier, but it’s not something I can predict.”
Vaishali is determined to continue talking about Jaya as a way of helping other bereaved families who may be feeling the same. She said, “I hope my story allows others in my community to see how we can honour our babies at this time of year and they are encouraged to mark Teras Shradh in a way they feel is right for them.”
Sands is here to support you this Shradh
Here at Sands, we know that talking about pregnancy and baby loss can be difficult. Please know that you are not alone, and there are people who understand and whom you can speak to in confidence. Whether your loss was recent or longer ago, we want you to know that we are here for you.