In May 2018 my husband and I discovered we were expecting our second child. We were both over the moon about having another baby!



The pregnancy was a normal pregnancy, albeit I was a bit sicker than with my first. Our screening tests all came back normal at 12 weeks, and like a lot of parents, we thought we’d entered the safe zone.



Fast forward to our 20 week anomaly scan where everything went so wrong. We were told Luke had very low amniotic fluid, although no diagnosis was given at this point. We waited all weekend to see a specialist at UCH on Monday, when we were told that our previous baby boy had Bilateral Renal Agenesis, a fatal anomaly where the kidneys fail to form.



We were offered two choices: either continue the pregnancy and they’ll treat Luke palliatively, or terminate the pregnancy. My husband and I chose to end our pregnancy with Luke, for his sake and to ensure he didn’t suffer.



We were induced on the 6th September at 8am and I birthed my perfect boy, stillborn at 21 weeks, into the world at 6.30pm. To have to make a decision to continue a doomed pregnancy or end your wanted pregnancy is an impossible choice, with no happy outcome.



The Baby Loss information pack provided by SANDS helped us and our family through our loss immensely. Without all that vital information my husband and I would’ve been lost.



Terminating for medical reasons is a selfless choice, made with nothing but love for your unborn baby. There is no right or wrong way to deal with fetal anomalies. It’s a personal choice, but thanks to charities like SANDS, the loss is made slightly more bearable.